June 6th 1430 Back to front
Just reread my last entries for June and September 1995, 9 months ago and it seems both a long time ago and in other respects just yesterday, particularly as Im lying here on the rocks below the apartments again , the Puig ses Molines I think they are called. And of course nothing and everything has changed since then, a new job, no boyfriend, a year older almost a year wiser.
Where is everyone? Amanda is in India and has been for 2 months, John is back in London and no longer a part of my life , only my past.and yet Ibiza remains gloriously unchanged, thank god. To come back here again is maybe the real stability in my life, to know that everything will more or less fit into place as before, is very comforting , yet also strangely exciting, so familiar and yet so fresh. So predictable and yet, at the start of a week, so full of promise. How odd. It is a sort of back to front world where starting something new is really about returning to something very old , both literally and metaphorically. Once again the literary merit most of this journal remains slightly questionable but given the fact that I have more or less stopped writing any other sort of regular diary now must have a certain sense of worth to me.
Ten Year Anniversary
This year marks the tenth anniversary of keeping a diary , i began on September 4th 1986 (and i may well be here on that day ten years on). I wonder if i would have envisaged what i would be doing a decade after starting it. Interesting that i was reading a book by the American author the Family of Max Desir then and i have another of his books to read whilst here this week. He didn`t write anymore books after´Family´ as he sadly died of AIDS in 1990.
I think that surely must of been my biggest question then Would I still be here on 1996, even I really doubted it then. And yet, here i am, large as life still. A little bruised and battered admittedly but none the less still here.And what of ten years from now?
Tribes
Book of the holiday at the moment is Tribes by Alexander stuart. Its an interesting story set in London based in Soho about the two new gods, as Frankie called them in Two Tribes. Sex and Violence . It is a slightly 1980´s viewpoint though I think the book was written in 1992. It is about a director who is interested about turning a play about football violence into a film and his adventures in the process. It´s odd that I always seem to end up reading something about London when I go away and that by being here it gives me a different perspective on it , seen from afar. Let´s see how it unfolds.
June 6th 1630 Changing apartmentos
Im in the process of changing apartments to number 11 or 4B as its now called, the flat Ive been in is 1A, the ground floor flat on the second block but I liked the look of a new flat Antonio has this year next door where the blond German women used to live. so I´m going to try that but I´ll be the first person there and they are still waiting for the beds to arrive! I sense a little bit of annoyance from Maria (the cleaning lady) at having to rush to get the new flat ready so quickly. Weather is absolutely beautiful and looks set fair that way at the moment. It gets dark so late here now , as its almost midsummer, at about 10. Feeling very relaxed and laid back already here.
London from Ibiza.
Interesting to me that I feel much less negative about London now than I used too last year. I´ve been feeling a whole lot better about the place than I did , recently I think it´s got a lot going for it culturally and to an extent spiritually too, It’s 2100 on my first day here and I´m feeling ultra relaxed and good already one day in. A little burnt but I´m being ultra careful this year and already been cruised after going for a walk after dinner on the rocks below , though I didn´t respond as it´s both too early and I´m not going out tonight either, so I get a good nights sleep. I need rest at present , no clubs or sex. Time for that later. I am kind of surprised how quickly I relaxed into everything this year and I do think that coming away by myself is a good idea as I´m able to take and make things at my own pace for once , which feels good to me and for me . Funnily enough I find I write better as well, that is words flow off my pen fluidly .It tells me something about how relaxed I am, in London I often find I have to really grip my pen hard to write and it physically hurts my wrist. A beautifully calm, clear night with no wind though its about 20C, so not to warm.
1500 On the rocks
Horoscope for 1996
Im still a little concerned about my horoscope for this year which ive had in the front of my diary , the trouble is its been too accurate )no really!)so far , it correctly predicted both my work issues and relationship problems and talked about my main problem with very sensitive skin and at the wnd it warmed me dont go on overseas summer holidays this year , you wont enjoy it. And what have i done?? This is summer and Im certainly overseas. So i am wondering what might happen. Will i break my leg, get badly sunburnt, get mugged. I am concerned I might will myself inmto a bad time by default!. Enough of this! The horroscope will not be allowed to become a horror scope. So far so good.
Squaddies, the non continuing saga.
No sign this year of the continuation of the cadet activity in the military hotel and grounds this year to my slight dismay, in fact its hardly being used at all by the look of it though a couple did play tennis on the courts last night.
Really too hot for me at the moment, I can feel myself burning up so am retiring to the apartment for a siesta.
1700 Update
I have a theory that Ibiza grants you wishes and so again today . No sooner had I written the above than who should come along but four cadets , they were in trunks this time though but I coped.They sat and messed around for an hour or two by the pool pushing each other in , smoking a joint or two and generally doing what cadets do best, looking smoking hot. Thanks Ibiza. Time to do some weights as that´s perked me up quite a bit.
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